Healing from Internalized Oppression
Re-launching in Summer/Fall 2018
Are you overwhelmed with trying to address even everyday oppression -
even though you're committed to social justice?
...then read on!
Stop Trying To Do It Alone...
You Can Be Held In Loving Community As
You Free Yourself To Address Everyday Oppression
YES, it IS possible to release the pain and fears that keep you from speaking your truth and be the loving person you dream of being in this fight for social justice.
I'm going to share with you a healing justice model that
includes step-by-step processes and community support -
and has worked for me and thousands of other people like you.
Let me show you how!
You're committed to dismantling systemic oppression...
but it can feel so painfully overwhelming to keep trying
Fighting systemic oppression at the structural level of the government, economy, and society is understandably a daunting task.
You can't just dismantle thousands of years of patriarchy, white supremacy, exploitative capitalism, corrupt governments, and other forms of systemic oppression in just a few years - no matter how committed you are.
Yet, sometimes the hardest part of fighting for social justice ends up being how much you want to fight with the people in your very own communities instead.
Sometime it's with people you care about but who don't understand systemic oppression or get why you care so much.
Sometimes it's with the very people you're trying to do social justice work with who you feel are doing oppressive and problematic things.
How often have you felt:
- Angry at how someone was defending Trump and just stopped talking to them
- Frustrated because you didn't know how to respond to someone's harmful actions without risking backlash
- Ashamed because you didn't realize something was problematic until you got publicly called out
- Judged for not doing enough for the cause even though you're already burnt out
- Powerless watching groups working for social justice tear themselves apart with infighting
- Helpless as someone in your social justice community is harassing you
- Lost because you want to do something to help but don't know what actually would help
And that's just dealing with the everyday oppression in your own personal community!
With Trump and his supporters threatening and attacking so many of our marginalized communities, it can feel like there's a never ending series of hits at every level of life.
It. Is. Exhausting.
I know. I've been there.
My trauma was driving me to social justice work -
and driving me into the ground
Growing up, I always knew that I was going to help people who were suffering.
At a young age, I came to the belief that when you cry, no one will come to help you. To survive in this harsh world, I decided to be an unbreakable rock.
So I made it my life mission to always go to those who cried out - because I was an unbreakable rock and I didn't want people to feel the pain of being abandoned in their suffering.
I believed my role in life was to let them know it wasn't their fault, that they weren't alone, and that it could get better.
Fast forward, I was working my dream job at a nonprofit in my early 20's.
But my life became filled with emotional abuse from people struggling with illness and trauma who claimed to care about me in both my personal and professional life.
It took a long time for me to register how they treated me as abusive and controlling.
I thought it was just my role in life to be there for people struggling - no matter the cost to myself.
This left me completely numbed out to my own pain of being emotionally abused and controlled - and therefore unable to name what they were doing to me.
I also didn't recognize it for what it was since it didn't look like the stereotypical physical abuse - but that didn't make it less damaging to me.
But once I recognized it as abuse with my friends reflecting back to me, I quickly moved to free myself of it.
And it hurt to do so.
I realized I needed to let go of my trauma-driven role and let my deep fears of not being there for struggling people come true.
That was the only way I could choose to quit my job and the abusive people in my life and create the space I needed to heal from not just the more recent abuse but also what had led up to it in my life.
I learned how my individual and collective trauma from oppression was showing up inside of me - and telling me lies about who I am and who I needed to be in order to be safe.
Lies that told me to sacrifice myself for others, to keep my dreams a secret, to not trust in people.
Lies that kept me from even knowing my true self, much less feel free to express it.
Since discovering the lies of internalized oppression, I've been on a decade long journey of Zen Buddhism-based healing and spiritual growth.
I have created and nurtured a life that is heart-centered, spirit-led, and community supported.
A life where I am free to know and express my true nature - a fierce love that burns away our oppressive illusions and calls us all higher.
I have learned to do this by continuously healing the pain that prevents me from embracing the wholeness of my messy humanity.
Free to embrace my full humanity with all my pain and fears, all my joys and dreams, I am also able to embrace the wholeness of other people's messy humanities, including those who hurt me.
When I can hold space for the wholeness of people who have hurt me, I am able to connect to them - not as monsters - but as human beings who have done something hurtful and have their own history of fears and dreams.
This allows them to also show up as human beings for themselves and for me and to see my humanity as well.
When we can all be affirmed in our humanity, we can come together to co-create a different future grounded in compassion and justice.
This Future Is Fully Possible For You Too
It's just a matter of intentionally practicing the steps for healing - and doing it in community.
I have read the books, taken the courses, gotten the therapy, and experimented with different approaches on myself and different social justice groups for the past 10 years.
I have boiled down those past 10 years into 10 weeks for you.
Unlike other books and programs that overwhelm you or offer information that doesn’t really give you actionable next steps, my program will give you a holistic system, step-by-step processes, and the community support to make sure you are held through out it.
The result is nothing less than...to stop feeling overwhelmed and frozen and finally feel grounded in your own humanity and agency that systemic oppression has tried to deny you.
Now, on this page I'm answering all of your questions about Healing from Marginalization, including what type of people we work with, what we teach, and how exactly this works.
So keep scrolling to get the answers you’re looking for.
What Other Members Are Saying...
"I was really struggling in mainstream non-profit organizational leadership and was hungry for practices to make it possible for me to engage in liberation work over the long haul.
With the help of this program, I am now more honest with both myself and others about what I really feel, want, and need and what I am or am not ready to do about those things.
Instead of waiting for oppressive conditions to be eliminated, I know I can care for my pain right now and identify choices available to me at any given moment. I'm more reconnected to my body as a reliable and consistent source of valuable information about what is important for my health and peace at any given moment in time.
This has helped me be less overwhelmed by my body's responses to pain, stress, etc. and to instead regard those as invitations to inquire about what is really going on and decide what I want to do about it.
Having options and being able to see and choose among them is a taste of liberation."
- Alexis F.
"This program has absolutely and powerfully impacted and shaped a new way for me to look at everything.
More than ever before, I’m able to move closer to the most painful and raw situations in my life to more deeply understand what I am experiencing.
Even if I’m upset with them, I’m also much more able to understand where other folks are coming from. I’m seeing the impact of this program playing out almost daily in my life!”
- Bernardita Y.
Do You Want To Learn...
- How to heal from internalized oppression and free yourself from toxic messages from systemic oppression,
- How to reconnect with people you care about but have broken relationships with, and
- How to build a loving, just community that supports everyone in it to be their most human selves?
Here's How I Can Help You
I’ve taken everything I’ve learned from healing from internalized oppression and channeled it into a comprehensive, step-by-step healing processes at the individual, relationship and community level.
You not only get the theory, but you also get the actual action steps that you can follow every time.
And all with the support of our community of practice - where we intentionally and compassionately practice being in loving community together - right here, right now.
HEALING FROM MARGINALIZATION ISN’T SO MUCH
A TRAINING PROGRAM AS IT IS A COMMUNITY OF PRACTICE.
Yes, you’ll learn the frameworks and step-by-step processes to create a loving and just community.
But more importantly, you’ll be doing it in Practice Circles with other like-minded members struggling with similar issues.
The end result: You'll be held in a loving community designed to help you heal from and address the everyday oppression in your life with love and justice.
What Other Members Are Saying...
"Before taking this program, my struggle was with checking in with myself in difficult conversations where I was triggered. This would make it hard to communicate effectively and mean what I say without being harmful.
Through this program, I gained a deep awareness of when I'm in emotionally difficult and triggering situations that allows me to step back before reactively saying hurtful things. This really helped to address uncomfortable situations instead of evading the real issue.
Now that I can be clear about what I mean when communicating - while holding myself accountable and responsible for my behavior. I am now able to speak up for myself and set clear and strong boundaries for myself and for others. It feels so empowering!"
- Esther P.
"This program has touched upon so much of what I needed in my life.
Just the other day I caught myself in an interaction with my husband, and I was able to pause in the middle of it and ask him "What are you feeling right now?"
I saw that the situation didn't need to escalate into anything, I could instead address the problem head on without all the trouble.
Before this program, I would've been really upset and wouldn't have been able to tap into what the real issue was. I would have been stuck in what the course calls the "toxic swirl" of painful thoughts and emotions.
What it all boils down to is communication, and that's been an invaluable lesson."
Here's What You Will Get
The Compassionate Justice approach shows how you can transform painful situations of everyday oppression into opportunities for:
Understanding How You've Internalized Oppression
Growing up in a society built on systemic oppression, it's impossible to not have internalized oppression. That helped us survive the ways we were being oppressed but it kept us trapped in there as well.
To begin taking steps to free yourself from that, you'll learn:
- How to notice when your internalized oppression is manifesting - even if you're unconscious to it
- How actions driven by internalized oppression often dehumanize you and others - even if you're just trying to protect yourself
- How to loosen the grip of internalized oppression on you - even if you feel overwhelmed
Healing Yourself Back Into Wholeness
Systemic oppression teaches that you aren't enough - as you are and are not. So you've unconsciously learned to reject your feelings and needs - even as you fight for others' feelings and needs to be honored.
To free yourself from that internalized oppression, you'll learn:
- How to get back all the time and energy you spend feeling angry and frustrated with others - and put it into taking self-compassionate action instead
- How to acknowledge the underlying pain - even if it's hard for you
- How to stop being scared of discovering you had done something harmful - and welcome the opportunity to hold yourself accountable
Healing Your Broken Relationships
Often times the people we care about the most are the ones who can most hurt us. If we aren't able to hold space for that pain within us and within the other person, we will be left feeling disconnected and distrustful.
To restore your broken relationships, you'll learn:
- How to address everyday injustice without silencing yourself or coddling the other person - even if they don't realize what they did was harmful
- How to engage in an dialogue with the other person - without it taking an emotional toll on you
- How to help people transform their ignorance and defensiveness into greater consciousness and compassion
Healing Your Dominating Communities
Even when we are fighting oppression and domination, we often end up perpetuating it because that's the community system we inherited. That's why even when activists come together, the way we make decisions and organize the work feels disempowering and dehumanizing.
To create a caring, self-governing community system, you'll learn:
- How to informally build the critical mass necessary to open up a public community conversation on how it's perpetuating oppression - even if you don't know who's on your side
- How to facilitate a inclusive decision-making process that includes people who disagree with you - while not letting them dominate the conversation
- How to structure the work so it's self-governing and leaderful- and therefore doesn't fall all on you to do
What Other Members Are Saying...
"I was struggling on how I should navigate doing my public health work, with a racial equity and social justice lens, while practicing good self-care.
As my framework of racism and oppression was deepening at harried pace, a new set of complex mental health challenges came about, once I began to confront my own internalized racism, and how it has shown up in my relationships, as well as in educational, artistic, and professional spaces, over the course of my life.
This program taught me practices to ground myself in the present moment, be determined to create and define space, and then to show up for my work, in a more authentic, engaged, and coordinated way. It helped me craft a still-developing determination to voice some of aspects of my internal reality, that I found so disturbing.
I am now able to shift the focus from being disturbed about what I lack, to focusing on how my journey can further enhance and authenticate what I desire to contribute."
-Stephen Antony Beasley, Musician, SAGAFTRA Actor, Public Health Advocate
“This program has given me specific tools to learn how to respond to situations instead of reacting to them by waiting to engage with others until I’ve taken care of my needs first.
I’ve always felt that I would be much more effective in reaching people and opening their hearts if I could have compassion for where they’re coming from.
That’s the magic of this program — it’s cultivating our imagination of what’s possible.”
– Suzanne H.